why i joined facebook

in many ways, this is self consciously the stupidest thing i have ever done. it is also art. it is also for stalking.

it curdles my milk to think of joining facebook, a supremely useless website, the virtual equivelent of repeatedly asking everyone 'we're friends aren't we? good. because.. you know... i wasn't sure for a minute there'. i activated my profile at six o'clock. when i got back from the gig at half 11, i had six friends.

this number may have doubled, or more by tomorrow.

myspace was never this intense. 'how do you know this person?' the site begs, with the grace of the front page of a free newspaper, and then forces the information from you with exacting, pigeon-hole effieciency. the website pleads with you that you invest so much time in it, setting up your friend list so that it mirrors your life in the most precise detail. how did you meet? who introduced who? who's the big match-maker? whic groups do i belong to? poke luke! whimper. it's so stressful.
and it goes on and on and on and on and on.

so then i joined the 'anti-facebook' group, only to find a bunch of comments from people saying it wasn't as good as myspace, and a few comments from people saying that i was stupid for joing facebook then joining anti-facebook. so i left.

still, it doesn't have the class of the guy whose sole mission in life was to have more myspace friends than tom. oh no, i'm making reference to myspace folklore...