a new england

i don't feel that different, but obviously something has changed; last night was a safe three pints. the first reneged on my decision to not drink lager - it was a shit pint of stella, which is saying something. but then we were in an o'neills (have you noticed thta o'neills don't even bother to give their pubs different names, like wehtherspoons do?) but i realy needed a pint and they had nothing else. also it wasn't me that ultimately made the decision to have stella ANYWAY, after that i had but two pints, both shoreditch stout, at the foundary. we - the girls, luke, ed's emma, and i, while a bunch of psychologist hen-nighters broke into our conversations, tricked us into saying things and then pretended to take offence. it was 'king bizzare. never, ever, ever, answer a woman who's asked you 'how old do you think i am?'. RUN.
we were kicked out gone 11, and i didn't drink the rest of the night, spending money on pies and cake instead. this is the new regime, and i motherfucking like it. i went home at one from the fifth place of the night (o'niells, foundary, prague, mother, jam), knowing i should go before i actually needed to. and i didn't get back til nearly three so that was a good idea. the night bus was full before we'd finished going through oxford circus, and many people looked pretty upset about it. plenty of people were upset on the bus too, not least the driver, it was pure school bus atmosphere, with him refusing to drive on until some persons got off, or marching upstairs to collect from a fare dodger.

i always arrange to do too many things. i always let people down, like on friday, arranging to see zabrinski in cardiff and not doing. it seemed so doable a few months ago. i probably won't go to the bobby mcgee's turds night tomorrow, despite having planned going at the first opportunity for ages. it's not good to let let people down; should i not make as many plans, or should i go to all the things i say i will?

i bumped into kev yesterday. i used to share a room in durham with him, and there seemed to be no connection there at all. i told him to google me, was as far as exchanging contact details went. but he said he was meeting up with wee dave later, which i did find interesting; but how do you ask for someone elses phone number without obviously not wanting the person you're speaking to's? it's not that we had a falling out - it's just that seperated from our connection, there was nothing there at all. he's in marketing now.

you should have seen the look on jo's face when i started playing 'banging in the nails' to her. i've never seen anyone so shocked.
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